Connie’s Compassion
Name:
Connie = consistent - loyal
(German meaning = brave counselor)
Marie = one who mourns
Backstrom = by the stream
Verse: John 10:27-30
“My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one can snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father’s hand. I and the Father are one.
Favorite Book:
Bible
Favorite Book #2:
The Complete Works of Oswald Chambers
(Discovery House Publishers)
Favorite Food:
Justin’s stuffed mushrooms
Jacob’s Swedish ham balls
Matthew’s Monte Cristo sandwich
Ryan’s Swedish apple pie
Favorite Quote:
“Life is hard,
God is good, & Heaven awaits us”
Favorite Quote #2:
“God engineers circumstances and brings us into difficult places where no one can help us, and we can either manifest the life of Jesus in those conditions, or else be cowards and say, ‘I cannot exhibit the life of God there.’ Then we deprive God of glory. If you will let the life of God be manifested in your particular human edition - where God cannot manifest it, that is why He called you, you will bring glory to God.”
Oswald Chambers “Approved unto God “ found in The Complete Works of Oswald Chambers published by Discovery House Publishers
2007
Please, Please, Please,
Don’t Drink and Drive
Choose Christ not alcohol or drugs
What was left of our shed after a tornado went through in 2008.
“He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” Revelation 21:4
My favorite songs
It is Well with My Soul
Wonderful Merciful Savior
Life Means So Much
Press on
In Christ Alone
My Prayer
Jesus Never Fails
In the Garden
Give yourself permission to cry.
Give yourself permission to laugh.
Find something EVERYDAY that will bring a smile to your face.
Almost every night after the crash we would choose a DVD to watch that would make us laugh.
MY FAVORITES:
The Cosby Show
Home Improvement
Houseboat with Sophia Loren
If God should pierce your soul...
Will you still trust Him?
Is God sovereign? Is He really in control?
Oswald Chambers, in “Approved unto God” writes, “God engineers circumstances and brings us into difficult places where no one can help us,...”
Consider Job:
It is God who points Satan in Job’s direction. Not just once but twice.
Job 1:8 “The LORD said to Satan, ‘Have you considered my servant Job?
Job 2:3 Again, “the LORD said to Satan, Have you considered my servant Job?”
Job’s sufferings were not punishment for some sin.
God was at work in and through Job’s suffering for a higher purpose. The story of Job’s suffering followed by God’s blessings has been a source of encouragement and strength to many who are facing heartaches and struggles of their own.
(Less than 2 months before our sons were killed, we went on an Alaskan cruise with Insight for Living. The theme of the cruise was “Leaving a Legacy,” and the study during the cruise was from Chuck Swindoll’s book, Job, A Man of Suffering. God was at work, preparing us for what He was sending our way. There is comfort in knowing that our LORD is always in control.
Our LORD is sovereign in all things. Not all things are good, yet......
The LORD works IN all things for the good of those who LOVE HIM, who have been called according to - HIS PURPOSE.
(Taken from Romans 8:28)
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I whispered, “LORD.....LORD, my sons did not deserve to die such violent deaths, they were good kids”.... then the LORD spoke to my heart, in His ever gentle and loving way He said, “My Son did not deserve to die; yet I sent Him anyway.”
“For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.” John 3:17
He sent His one and only Son to rescue the souls of men & women.
In Luke 22:22 Jesus says, “The Son of Man will go as it has been decreed, but woe to that man who betrays him.”
Jesus did not just happen to suffer and die, and then the LORD decided he would figure out how to use the event. He was sent by his Father to redeem the souls of man through his suffering, death and resurrection.
God is Sovereign.
In Acts 2:22-24 we read, “Men of Israel, listen to this: Jesus of Nazareth was a man accredited by God to you by miracles, wonders and signs, which God did among you through him, as you yourselves know. This man was handed over to you by God’s set purpose and foreknowledge; and you, with the help of wicked men, put him to death by nailing him to the cross. But God raised him from the dead, freeing him from the agony of death, because it was impossible for death to keep its hold on him.”
Thank you LORD for sending your Son, Jesus Christ, Yeshua Messiah, to ransom me, to redeem me from the pit of hell, to forgive my sin and give to me eternal life with you.
Recently, I was studying the song, “It is Well with My Soul.” The second line of the song especially jumped out at me. “When sorrows like sea billows roll” written by Horatio Gates Spafford, a man acquainted with sorrow, a Job of the 19th century. After suffering financial ruin and the death of his 4 daughters, Spafford wrote the words to “It is Well with My Soul.”
I had been pondering the question: How does one explain deep sorrow to someone who has never experienced deep sorrow - bone crushing sorrow?
The word billows means a large wave - to surge. Cross reference to belly: the definition that seemed to fit best was the deep interior of a thing.
For me, Deep sorrow feels like being in a small ship, on a vast ocean, tossed on rolling waves. Just as you reach the top of a rolling wave and are about to plummet down into the deep, there’s that feeling from deep within the pit of your stomach... That feeling you get when you’re on a roller coaster ride.....the feeling like you’ve left your stomach back at the top. Only, the ride doesn’t end. It goes on and on, day after day, perhaps year after year.
Just when I think the waters are beginning to calm down...another waves hits me from out of the blue. Once again that sickening feeling from the pit of my stomach radiating to my fingers and toes comes back. That to me is the feeling of Deep Sorrow.
A thought, a memory and my eyes fill with tears. That doesn’t mean I want to push away the memories of my Matthew, Jacob, and Justin. Never! I treasure every memory, and if tears are the price I must pay for those memories I will treasure every tear.
Paul writes in Revelation 21:4
“He (God) will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”
But until that day, there will be weeping; there will be pain; there will be death. So for now we must hold on to the truth that the day is coming when all our heartaches will be no more, when Jesus Christ, Yeshua Messiah, calls us home to be with him for all eternity.
Looking back at “It is Well with My Soul,” there’s so much more to the song, in the first line, “When peace, like a river, attendeth my way.” When Jesus Christ is Lord of one’s life, even in deep sorrow, there is a peace beyond understanding; the calm assurance that the LORD is in control and all not only will be well, but all is well.
In that still small voice He whispers to your soul... “Trust Me.”
Is God sovereign?
Consider Naomi from the book of Ruth in the Old Testament. Naomi had to leave her home because of a famine. Her husband dies while they are living in a foreign land. Her sons marry women not approved of by her family. Her sons die, leaving her with these 2 daughter-in-laws. It was through these tragedies that the LORD chose Naomi to bring Ruth to Boaz so that they would become the great-grandparents of King David, and the ancestor of Jesus Christ.
Naomi suffered for God’s higher purpose.
Those who are suffering sometimes wonder, “why hasn’t God come to take us all home?”
Perhaps the answer can be found in 2 Peter 3:9
“The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.”
2009 is upon us, for a moment I will look back at 2008.
It was a busy year. I continue to educate Ryan & Charles at home with the help of our TEACH consultant, Donna.
Ryan still plays the string bass in orchestra & Charles continues to play the viola, and has added percussion lessons to his schedule.
We had many opportunities to share the story of our boys in 2008 and we pray that the LORD will continue to work mightily in the lives of those who have heard the story God has given us. It was incredible how many times I would think, this is too hard, I can’t do this anymore, then I would be reminded that I told the LORD I would go wherever He opened the door. So many times, I would find my heart aching for those who shared their challenges with me, in that way the LORD gave me a glimpse of why He had sent us there.
This past summer had a few challenges to sort through.
While we were away at family camp a storm, straight line winds or an EF1 tornado, rolled through our property. It picked up our shed and spread it across our neighbor’s property. Everything attached to the walls went flying with the shed. This unfortunately, included the ‘49 Chevy Matthew was in the process of rebuilding when his life was taken. Things in the shed not attached to the walls barely moved. (May 7 2009, I just found the front axel for Matthew’s Chevy in the bushes to the south) There was some damage to the house, which took some time to fix.
One of our neighbors asked, “What did you do to make God mad at you? First He took your boys and now He’s destroyed your shed.” All I could think of was; all that we have belongs to the LORD. I guess He wanted us to have a bigger better shed. As for my boys, they belonged to the LORD before October 10th and now they are with Him eternally.
Something to think about: Jesus Christ, the only one who can claim to be perfect, yet he suffered, died, and rose from the grave to live eternally. He did nothing to deserve all that he suffered.
The story of JOB from the Old Testament comes to mind.
Job’s 10 children were taken from him, but then the LORD gave to Job 10 more children.
Three of our sons were taken; two were left.
Job’s income was taken away when his flocks & herds were destroyed or stolen.
Nathan received a large pay cut around the time our boys were killed; yet he was able to take time off from work and receive sick pay.
The property of Job’s son was destroyed.Our property was damaged, not totally destroyed.
Job’s body suffered.
We have our aches and pains but I think that’s called getting old. God only knows what lies ahead for us.
August before the boys were killed we had been on a cruise with Insights for Living, with Chuck Swindoll, the topic was Leaving a Legacy, studying the story of JOB. I don’t believe in coincidences. I believe the LORD in His mercy was letting us know that He was and is in control; that we can trust Him with whatever challenges come our way.
Is it always easy to trust a God we cannot see or hear? No. That is why it is called faith, it is a choice that we must make daily; calling on the Holy Spirit to give us strength to believe when our strength is failing.
We took a family vacation to Alaska on a cruise with KTIS, it was a time to rest and be refreshed for our life’s journey. Sadly, when we arrived back home we found Ryan’s dog, Blackie, dead. Our house sitter said that Blackie had seemed fine when she left for work that night. Ryan now has a new German Shepherd puppy, what a sweetie - most of the time.
September 7th 2008, RBC Ministries, Day of Discovery, released the story, When God Takes What Matters Most, interviews with the Backstrom family & friends, and September 14th interviews with the Mayer family & friends.
October 11th we gathered with friends and family to remember Matthew, Jacob, & Justin, and look back at how the LORD is at work in our lives.
The Christmas season was a little crazy for us as we decided to invite both my family & Nathan’s family to help us celebrate Christmas. It was great having family here, yet it was hard, my Matthew, Jacob, & Justin should have been here.
New Year’s Eve, friends came to help us celebrate the end of 2008, the gift of friendships, and hope for all our tomorrows.
Each day is a gift from God. We are not guaranteed tomorrow. How we use the day God has given us is our gift to God. So today, I will get up and do what I can do, always and only with the help of the LORD just one step at a time until He calls me home.
My prayer for you is that you would draw close to the LORD and that HE would strengthen and equip you to do the work that HE has prepared for you. I pray that you will be a blessing to HIM.
Update: 7 December 2010
We recently returned from Hawaii. New Hope Christian Fellowship Oahu flew us over to share our testimony at 5 New Hope Oahu services and a special event put on by the Joshua Neves Children’s Foundation. Maxwell & Erica Neves started the Joshua Neves Children’s Foundation after their 3 year old son Joshua died of complications of H1N1 in June of 2009. Then on Christmas Day 2009 Erica had a miscarriage. Max & Erica have a powerful testimony that can be found on ( enewhope.org ). Their desire is to help other families that are struggling with the death of a child or children. They share their struggles and their victories.
28 May 2011
It’s hard to believe. Our Ryan just graduated. It was a bitter sweet graduation. While on the one hand I am so proud of Ryan and all his accomplishments and excited to see what he will choose to do in the days and years ahead, I had to fight the tears that come from knowing that his brothers Jacob and Justin never got to graduate.
We were asked to give the keynote address for Ryan’s graduation. Our challenge to the class, their family and friends was this: When you are faced with the challenges of life, and you will face challenges, disappointments, and heartaches at some point, keep your focus on Jesus Christ; trust that the LORD is at work in these difficult circumstances to perfect you for your good, and HIS purpose.
The class motto was Corrie ten Boom’s quote, “Never be afraid to trust an unknown future to a known God.” The class song was “Be Thou My Vision.”
The class verse was Isaiah 41:10, “Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.”
April 2013
It’s been awhile since I’ve updated my notes, so here goes. It’s hard to believe that it has been 8 1/2 years since Matthew, Jacob, & Justin were taken from us so violently.
Easter Sunday, at the Friendship Church in Shakopee, I was sharing a little of the story God has given us and how it fits with the Easter story.
There are 3 crosses in a ditch that should remind us of the 3 crosses on Calvary and the 1 Savior that has redeemed us.
3 brothers didn’t deserve to die such violent deaths
Matthew= Gift of God
Jacob= One who took the place of another
Justin= Upright and just
Jesus/Yeshua didn’t deserve to die.
God’s gift to us;
Jesus took our place (paid the price for our sins);
Jesus, the only one who ever lived that is truly upright & just.
That part of the story has always seemed so obvious to me, but the part that hit me this time was how the distracted drunk driver represents each one of us. His name means beautiful one, Jehovah is my God.
In between services, I was visiting with a man who had the look of one who has had a hard life. He was grateful for the church and those who were helping him, but he said he didn’t think God could forgive him. That’s when it really hit me. Everyone of us has been tried and found guilty of murder. WHAT?
Have you ever thought, “Sure I’ve messed up in my life, but at least I’ve never killed anyone.”?
Please, let me explain.
The Bible says that Jesus Christ died for our sins, right?
The Bible says that all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.
The Bible says that the penalty for sin is death.
It was on account of our sin that Jesus had to die, therefore everyone that has ever lived or will ever live is guilty of murder.
The only one that is innocent is Jesus the Christ/ Yeshua Messiah.
Jesus was brutally murdered because of our sins. He took the penalty for our sin - served our sentence. Though we will surely die for our sins, because He conquered death when He rose from the dead we too will be raised to live for eternity with Christ.
When we repent of our sin and ask Jesus to be Lord of our life and make Jehovah our God, I believe the FATHER sees us through Christ’s eyes and calls us beautiful.
Jesus Christ has made a way for you to spend eternity with him. Will you accept or reject Him? He has never forced anyone to accept the GIFT of salvation that He offers. The choice is your.
Thank you for visiting our website.
To be continued..........